Pagan Journeys > In the Broom Closet

How being Pagan can affect others in your family.

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WhitePhoenix:
Don't get me wrong, I agree that spirituality is a personal thing, and by being completely out of the Broom Closet I don't mean I would be obnoxious. But it does worry me that if others in the family did somehow find out, there would be a conflict.

BronwynWolf:
Just live  your life the best you can, Kit. If they do find out along the line, they will also have to look at the fact you are the same person now they know as before they found out.

Yes, I did have that "problem". My parents knew about my Path, although we rarely got into religious or spitiual discussions. My godmother, gods love her, was devout Catholic. We just never mentioned it, and she didn't expect me to go to church every week, and that was it...Until I got married. I had some pagany badges on the dashboard of my car, and she rode with me to the wedding site the day before to help with the cleaning. When we got back to my parents', I was a nervous wreck. She hadn't commented to me. I KNEW she would say something to them. I was right. She asked my mother about it. Mom told her calmly that I had found a different spitiual path, and I was happy and content, and it had even helped me master some problems my aunt was aware I'd been dealing with. ANd that was the end of that. The aunt told my mother that, as I was an adult, she guessed it was my choice to make and she just hoped I'd be safe with it. She never mentioned it to me, or anyone else as far as I know. No one was treated differently after. Ce la vie.

vordan:

--- Quote from: WhitePhoenix on July 30, 2011, 04:00:24 PM ---Don't get me wrong, I agree that spirituality is a personal thing, and by being completely out of the Broom Closet I don't mean I would be obnoxious. But it does worry me that if others in the family did somehow find out, there would be a conflict.

--- End quote ---

Some people upon finding out, will want you to be ashamed of being different  from them, though you have done nothing wrong. They will try and bring you to your metaphoric knees to beg forgiveness for the sin of being not like them. It will not matter if they break you, your offense to them is unforgivable and their world too small. You must at those times be candid about your beliefs, stare them in the face and never be ashamed. They will perhaps then respect you a little even if they shun you. You are who you are.

VisionFromAfar:
One major thing I will say before sharing my own anecdote is something that Jason over at The Wild Hunt (awesome site for those of you yet to discover it!) posted is when you are confronted about your beliefs, do not let them dictate your beliefs to you. By that I mean speak only of what you do believe (divinity in all things, many paths, etc.), rather than let a conversation dwell on what you don't believe (don't worship the Xtian Devil et al., etc.). This will reinforce for your listener, even if they come away believing you're going to hell (as a Heathen, I usually laugh), when they replay the conversation in their mind (and they will), all of your talking points will be positive, non-threatening messages. Just my  :2cents:.

As for dealing with overly-zealous family members, I have to admit I may get some on-the-job training with that. My mother-in-law has been aware of our (MrsV, LilV, and m'self) beliefs for a good while now (even watched LilV while we would go to coven meetings before that fell apart), but since moving closer to her own family (she's one of 13 siblings!), all of whom are very religous, she's become...well...a bit of a Jesus-freak, lacing nearly every phone conversation and Facebook message with a religious subtext. I hope I can keep a cool head and follow my own above advice when the (I believe inevitable) confrontation occurs. My own parents have been as supportive as you describe yours being, and what a blessing that is. I'm glad they're behind you in this.

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