Pagan Journeys > Beginner's Chat

How to get over fear?

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diniesaur:
Yes, I've been not commenting for a while because things have been pretty hard for me lately. I even have intertia just starting this post, but that's probably more of Autism than anything else.

I feel like I would love to start doing a small offering/purification ritual every morning, or with some form of regularity, and I've been feeling this way for quite a while, but I've been held up because I'm afraid that I'll miss a day and disappoint my gods (I have less control over my schedule than I would like because of my age). I don't think I'll Incure Their Wrath or be Struck Down, but I've never liked disappointing anyone. I know this is irrational because it's probably worse to do nothing (or nothing regularly) than to do it most days and miss one day, but I can't get out of the fear. It's just like in college where if I forget to turn in work I'll be afraid to turn it in the next day, or if I'm a little late for class I'll be afraid to go at all because I don't want the professor to get mad at me. No matter how many times people have said, "Better Late Than Never," I still have that fear. I think I have a much better chance at getting over this fear than I did the other one, though.

I know that it's not EsSEnTiAl for everyone to do a ritual every day, or every week, or whatever, but I feel like it would work for me if I could just start doing it and not mess up. It's overwhelming, but it would be great if I could succeed. Can anyone help me with this?

Ghost Wolf:
Repeat the following:

I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.

-Bene Gesserit Litany Against Fear - From Frank Herbert's Dune Book Series © 1965

earthmuffin:
If you've ever been afraid of jumping or diving into deep water, you know how it gets harder the more you stand on the edge thinking about your fear and trying to summon courage. This is like that. You have to just jump on in without giving yourself time to think.

vordan:
I really like Ghostwolfs quote!  Tell the Gods that in all things you will do your best, that you are not perfect, you are but human,  and remember to tell that to yourself.

Mongo:
Ok, you know that the Divine (however you perceive him/her/them/it) is understanding that life sometimes does not permit you from doing what you want to do all the time. And you know that they are not going to crack open the sky and drop a plague og frogs on you if you miss a day.

You've been here long enough and you've read enough to know this. So what are you really afraid of?

That's the first step. Identifying what you are scared of. Are you *really* scared of disappointing entities that you know are not going to disappoint? Or are you scared of letting yourself down? Or is there another factor altogether?

Look into yourself and try to find out what is the inhibiting factor. What are you really afraid of. Once you know that, post back and we can try to help you overcome it. I'd hate to wax poetic about helping you overcome a fear of something only to find out that it's not helping because that's not what you're afraid of.

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