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Author Topic: what's wrong with this picture?  (Read 208 times)

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earthmuffin

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what's wrong with this picture?
« on: April 20, 2011, 11:12:33 AM »

http://www.dailytribune.com/articles/2011/04/20/news/doc4daedecd154c1932590226.txt?viewmode=2

I was disturbed to read that the school is thinking of sending the kid who brought the gun to another school for 180 days as discipline while the other parents are wanting metal detectors. What about holding the parents accountable? Do people not believe in parental responsibility any more?

It seems everywhere I turn over the past couple of days I hear about lack of parental responsibility or rather lack of parents thinking any kind of discipline or strictness is necessary with their kids. Yesterday a coworker told me she babysat for a child whose parents told her she was never to tell the child "no." If she encountered resistance she should talk with him about his feelings. I'm all for validating a kid's feelings, but don't people see that not expressing any disapproval of anything a kid does is setting the kid up for failure when he encounters disapproval in the world?

I also got together with some of my own extended family members over the weekend and learned that one of them who has teenage boys a) allows one son to be in his room with his girlfriend all the time with no supervision and paid for a hotel room for his son, girlfriend and friends to party in for prom and b) does not say anything when the other son's grandparents (the divorced mother's parents) throw him a 15 year birthday party complete with pot they have bought for him and his friends because that is "what he likes to do."

Lack of personal responsibility and any kind of standards or expectations for behavior or performance also seems to be getting reinforced in schools. Our school does virtually nothing about theft. It's treated as if it is just a problem you have to accept if you are the victim. And with the No Child Left Behind Act, my teacher friends tell me there is virtually no way for them to hold a child back a grade for poor performance. I volunteer in my kids' school and the children especially the older ones show no respect for adult parents in the classroom and think it is OK to talk over their teacher, talk during tests, etc.

I feel like the world is going to hell in a handbasket or else I'm getting to be a real old fuddy duddy, like old people were when I was young. Do you think it was always like this and back in the Roman Empire, Nero's (insert your tyrant of choice) relatives were sitting around thinking "boy, his parents are really spoiling him. He's going to end up a real tool."  :confused:
« Last Edit: April 20, 2011, 11:36:23 AM by earthmuffin »
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Tirya

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Re: what's wrong with this picture?
« Reply #1 on: April 20, 2011, 11:25:24 AM »

The parents in the gun situation ABSOLUTELY need to be held accountable. The kid was six years old. According to the Hoston Chronicle, Child Protective Services plans to question the parents. Hopefully HPD will also get involved. There is zero excuse for letting a six year old bring a loaded gun anywhere. And if the parents "didn't know" then there is no excuse for a six year old having unsupervised access to a loaded weapon. Stupidity like that is unconscionable.
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Re: what's wrong with this picture?
« Reply #2 on: April 20, 2011, 11:30:48 AM »

I am often appalled at what other parents allow their kids to do or that they think is okay.  Sure, there is a lot I allow my kids to do that stricter parents probably wouldn't allow, but basic human interaction, manners and in general, being a good person are non-negotiable in this household.  I am no where near a perfect parent, but my kids are really good kids that have learned to treat other people with respect.

When I sent an email to the oldest's gym teacher earlier in the year about his lock and gym bag being stolen, the teacher came across as offended and basically refused to even look into the possibility that there was a theft.  It is no wonder so many kids continue with their bad behavior because there aren't ANY adults in their lives that are willing to show them that there is another way or that what they are doing is wrong.  Usually by the time they actually do encounter one, it is too late to change the child's attitude.
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dragonspring

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Re: what's wrong with this picture?
« Reply #3 on: April 20, 2011, 08:58:28 PM »

First off, I think you might have some misconception about the kindergartner being sent to a "different" school.  The article said "alternative" school which is basically another name for a school for kids that don't fit into mainstream schools due to disciplinary reasons.  I have been in one of those schools lately.  There are cops all over the place.

Obviously, the parents should be held accountable in that situation and perhaps the child should be removed from their custody.

I also am appalled at the lack of personal responsibility being displayed by most adults and children nowadays. 
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earthmuffin

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Re: what's wrong with this picture?
« Reply #4 on: April 20, 2011, 09:43:34 PM »

DS, I was more appalled the school thought it necessary to discipline the kindergartner so harshly for this when I'm sure he didn't really understand it was a bad idea. I understand someone needs to explain some things to him because obviously his parents aren't doing that but is putting him elsewhere for 180 days really going to help him? If this were an older child more capable of understand the rules and harm that might come from his actions, it would be a different story of course.

What I'm left wondering is do schools really send  6-year olds off to juvie-type schools? First, I can't imagine a school like that would even have enough kids that age to have the need to hire a kindergarten teacher. But what is more puzzling to me is that the school actually has that as a disciplinary option. You know about the problems I had with a much older juvenile offender at our school. Our school administration acted helpless to do take any action against him at all despite several serious infractions. I'm pretty certain in the end he was removed only because his parole officer decided he should be and not because the school really had a choice in the matter.
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bluefire

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Re: what's wrong with this picture?
« Reply #5 on: April 23, 2011, 12:26:26 PM »

Wow.  Six year olds cannot possibly understand the consequences of carrying around a loaded gun.  Those parents need a talking to.
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BronwynWolf

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Re: what's wrong with this picture?
« Reply #6 on: April 23, 2011, 04:29:50 PM »

AT the age of six, the consequences I knew would come from TOUCHING a gun: Dad was gonna whomp my butt to the point I'd need a pillow to sit for supper.
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Re: what's wrong with this picture?
« Reply #7 on: April 25, 2011, 01:24:15 PM »

AT the age of six, the consequences I knew would come from TOUCHING a gun: Dad was gonna whomp my butt to the point I'd need a pillow to sit for supper.


Amen to that one!  I would have gotten a whoppin like I had never had before if I even thought about touching one!
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RosemarySarah

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Re: what's wrong with this picture?
« Reply #8 on: June 28, 2011, 03:33:08 PM »

Disrespect has become basically encouraged in our school systems. As a recent high school graduate, I can attest to that. I have sat through classes where the teacher stands in the front of the room, trying to speak, and the rest of the class is carrying on conversations. Now, you'd think they'd be whispering or something, but no. They're practically shouting. And the teacher tries a few times to regain control, but eventually gives up.

It's the most annoying thing in the world. The teachers don't know how to discipline and the students don't have a modicum of respect. And THAT is why I am so excited to go to college and hopefully not deal with this issue!  :groovin:
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Satine

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Re: what's wrong with this picture?
« Reply #9 on: July 31, 2011, 11:58:55 AM »

Just reading this kinda makes me want send my kids (when i have them) to home school... but i need a job and the kids need to be social early on. this kind of makes me sad.
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