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Author Topic: Personal responsibility  (Read 637 times)

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DragonsFriend

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Personal responsibility
« on: May 01, 2016, 11:58:46 AM »

I was taught that personal responsibility was part of the pagan path. It is one of my guiding principals.
Is it a part of your path? If so what limits do you place on it?
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Crystal Dragon

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Re: Personal responsibility
« Reply #1 on: May 01, 2016, 03:34:42 PM »

I was taught that personal responsibility is part of being human ... regardless of path.

There are no limits to personal responsibility.  You make a choice, you live with it.

Sadly, our society appears to have gone in the opposite direction ... or perhaps only those who behave like entitled brats are noteworthy.  I'd like to think that the majority of individuals are responsible for their choices and actions but I just don't see it much of the time.
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Re: Personal responsibility
« Reply #2 on: May 01, 2016, 04:12:43 PM »


I addressed personal responsibility here http://paganjourneys.com/index.php?topic=1579.msg26406#msg26406

peace,
ES
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DragonsFriend

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Re: Personal responsibility
« Reply #3 on: May 02, 2016, 02:30:06 PM »

I was taught that personal responsibility is part of being human ... regardless of path.

There are no limits to personal responsibility.  You make a choice, you live with it.

Sadly, our society appears to have gone in the opposite direction ... or perhaps only those who behave like entitled brats are noteworthy.  I'd like to think that the majority of individuals are responsible for their choices and actions but I just don't see it much of the time.

This is the way that I feel about personal responsibility as well. If I, or someone else, messes up and finds themselves in too deep, a hand up is sometimes required, but if they make themselves a victim to get hand outs it is no longer ok. Like you, I think there are too many who cast themselves as victims so they will be "taken care of" while hating the very system they use.
I have put myself in bad situations that I have needed help to get out of and thankfully I have had family and friends to help out. I had to do the work and pay back money and felt that I should pay the kindness as well. I learned from my life that one chooses to be a victim or not and that choice is what defines you.
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dragonspring

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Re: Personal responsibility
« Reply #4 on: May 03, 2016, 10:43:38 AM »

I feel much the same way about personal responsibility and the victim mentality.  It took some years for me to figure out the latter but I am much happier for it.  :D
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Re: Personal responsibility
« Reply #5 on: May 03, 2016, 11:55:52 PM »

I am also of a similar mind to those who have posted; however, as one who tends to take too much personal responsibility for things over which I have little or no control, I try to maintain a balanced view as much as possible.
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Athena

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Re: Personal responsibility
« Reply #6 on: May 11, 2016, 04:08:26 AM »

This is one topic on which I am seeking other PJ members' opinions. While I fully agree on what CD just said, personally, for me, the personal responsibilities and ethics (I find both mutually inclusive) vary from person to person or rather, situation to situation. I try and do / think / act as much as I can, but certain limitations play in to each situation, which would be hard to describe here.
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DragonsFriend

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Re: Personal responsibility
« Reply #7 on: May 11, 2016, 09:58:31 PM »

Do we apply the same standard to others that we do to ourselves?
If a person habitually loses jobs or destroys relationships because of their actions or lack thereof how do we respond to giving them help that never seems to work?

Sorry to be so vague but I am trying to evaluate my "first response" to people who continually ask for help and then end up in the same situation over and over. I tend to believe that they are avoiding a lesson that is being presented in increasing intensity until they either must learn it or just change the way they make decisions.
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Crystal Dragon

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Re: Personal responsibility
« Reply #8 on: May 12, 2016, 04:07:53 AM »

... for me, the personal responsibilities and ethics (I find both mutually inclusive) vary from person to person or rather, situation to situation ...

I'm trying hard to imagine a situation that would necessitate an alternative stance and cannot come up with anything that might apply ... either you take responsibility for your actions or you don't.  IMHO it's really that simple.

Yes, we may try and "justify" our behavior but if we're honest with ourselves and others, such justification (or perhaps an outright attempt to blame others) is just an attempt to feel better about doing something we know at our core that we shouldn't have done in the first place.
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Athena

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Re: Personal responsibility
« Reply #9 on: May 12, 2016, 05:15:16 AM »

Yes, we may try and "justify" our behavior but if we're honest with ourselves and others, such justification (or perhaps an outright attempt to blame others) is just an attempt to feel better about doing something we know at our core that we shouldn't have done in the first place.

Okay, I am a bit confused here. If you cannot justify your thoughts or actions, how do you figure out if they were just as they should have been?

Like fr me, there is a set of principles which I follow, or rather, try to follow. If I can check all those, I am certain that I did what was required of me. If not, I'd try to see a reason behind my wayward behaviour.
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VisionFromAfar

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Re: Personal responsibility
« Reply #10 on: May 12, 2016, 10:22:41 AM »

Okay, I am a bit confused here. If you cannot justify your thoughts or actions, how do you figure out if they were just as they should have been?

I can give you a concrete example.
I've been trying to eat healthier for years. It's been a slow, aggravating process, but over the last five years, I've managed to cut what was a 3-soda-per-day habit down to maybe one a month, if that. I've started packing lunches, focusing on fruit and veggies. Lately I've started working on portion sizes. But my problem remains: candy. Specifically Reese's.

I'm fully convinced I'm addicted to sugar, and that the highly processed forms found in candy and commercial ice cream muck about with my gut now (discovered through trial and error in precisely this example). This past Easter, there was the after-holiday sale at the local grocers. Guess who bought several pounds of Reese's Easter Eggs? Now, I told myself when I was buying them that I could pop them in the freezer and just eat one or two a day for an after-supper desert. That was a Shallow Justification number 1. Because based on my own knowledge of my past behavior, I knew damn well how hard it was going to be to keep to that. Sure enough, I was soon eating 4-5 pieces a day. Any moment when I would get the munchies was fair game for another sugar hit. My intestines hated me for a full month, until I had successfully worked through three bags worth of candy. I told myself I was addicted, and I would just keep up this pace until they were all gone, then not buy any more. Simple, right? Shallow Justification number 2. Every time I would finish a piece, I would wonder why I even ate them, because I couldn't honestly say if I liked the taste after the fact, and by mid-month, I was certain they were the cause of my gut problems. But it was a habit now, and I had no problem with this kind of diet in college... Shallow Justification number 3.

We can find justifications for almost anything. The real test comes when we look to where those come from and how much weight we want to give them, based on those principles we follow. It's not about not finding a justification, but rather which ones we use. I decided for an extended period of time to suppress some of my principles, namely self-control and long-term views on health decisions, and accept my own justifications. I've still got one bag left in the deep freeze, and I see it every time I open the chest. I've got a couple pints of ice cream too. I pass those handy-dandy, super-convenient resealable bags of little Reese's every week in the grocery store ("Hey, I'll just grab one or two, just enough to satisfy the cravings, I can handle it, right?").

Now, however, my craving has moved from a bad justification to a factor for consideration. I've learned from this mistake, but it's not exactly a lesson I wanted to learn. It's harder to keep to my principles than it would have been had I not backslid, but they're winning and I'm down to twice a week, a single candy or one scoop of ice cream, and a "no, you don't even like it, much less need it" mantra at the grocery store. I also have a strong complex about throwing away perfectly good food that constantly wars with my portion control principles (but that's slowly finding a balance, too), so I'm still going to "work through" what sweets I have, but strictly regimented.

We'll see come October if I'm strong enough to resist the siren call of Reese's Pumpkins. I certainly hope so. :faint:
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Athena

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Re: Personal responsibility
« Reply #11 on: May 13, 2016, 02:19:36 AM »

Hmm... So I get it now VAF. And, I'll remind you in October to curb your cravings towards Resee's Pumpkins. :D
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